Lean On You[Lil]

[Ripley Todd]

[x] [x] [x]

[Time: 12:00—Place: Courtyard—Date: September 5th]


Originally she had meant to go to lunch, but then again Ripley would’ve skipped a day’s meal altogether just to spend the hour outside in the fall air. She left the cobble stone floors for the soft grass. The brisk wind blew back the uniform skirt that she had to wear, but truthfully in her third year burned on purpose as a protest. That had landed her with a two week detention.

That day was different, that day Ripley had gone out of her shell and worn her brown hair down, and to the shock of the friends who knew her best had worn make-up, very ,very ,very light make-up. Why? How could she explain it to her friends? Ripley knelt and picked up a red leaf from a tree, twirling the stem between her fingers. She liked Remus. Wanted to make him like her to, so she decided to mix it up a bit.

Sighing heavily Ripley shifted her long legged walk towards the lake. “Who am I kidding?” She asked herself softly. “If there’s a prize for rotten judgment, I guess I’ve already won that.” She kicked aside a rock as if it were her heart. “No man is worth the aggravation, unless your dyin’ to cry your heart out.” She plopped down a flat boulder. The wind blew her hair, strands went across her face, blocking her vision and sticking to her lips, she used her right hand to comb it back into place.

Dark caramel eyes watched the ripples on the sunlit water. She would never admit, being a technical hockey player and one of the guys, but she loved to cuddle with her pillow at night, pretend the warmth she felt from the blankets was a boy’s chest, something that she could use for a pillow, a tissue, and a punching bag.

“Gods, this is so fuckin’ pitiful!” Ripley picked up a stone from the beach and hurled it into the water. Looking down at her wrist she saw her hair elastic. “Fuck him.” She snarled and pulled her back into its classic ponytail with shaking hands, a few strands snuck loose. “I need a guy.” She shook her head, the loose strands falling along her cheekbones. “I don’t need a guy. No, listen me Todd, you do not need a guy least of all, a nice, caring, sensitive, cute, brown haired, blue eyed—“ She looked down at the ground, sniffling. “Shit, now I feel like crying.” Brown eyes stared at the rocks and she saw two ants touching each other. She looked up feeling a sharp pain in her heart and saw two birds making a nest. “Give me a break.” She cursed them and looked towards the castle. Yet again, there was a couple.

“Oh, now that just—“ She shook her head. The American witch sighed. “That ain’t cool.” She wiped away a stray tear that had fallen from one brown orb. "Shit, I need a friend."

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[Lily Evans]

Tugging on her collar she was desperately waiting for class to be over, she was tired of being the only one answering all the questions and getting no house points for it, when was she ever going to cut a break in Transfigurations? Oh right, never because the professor hated her. The black Mary Janes scoffed at the floor while her feet kicked wildly, just three more minutes, what would be so hard about waiting. Okay legging swinging back and fourth. Back and fourth back and fourth. Damn. She never cursed but now she really wanted to. Lily was just waiting for those dreaded words of weekend work, and on a Hogsmeade weekend at that! Okay two more minutes. Shoving her books back into her bag she looked longingly to the clock. "And where do you think you're going, Miss Evans?" Snapping her head up, wild pools of green looked towards her teacher and knew that she was so utterly screwed. "You seem to be in such a hurry," The clock started making the atrocious dinging sound and everyone was standing up, everyone but Lily since she knew this was just the beginning of an unsatisfying talk., "I think you need some time to think over how important this class is to you. Maybe in detention? Same time and same place, you know the drill."

"Sounds lovely." Came the sarcastic remark from the red head while she stood from the desk. walking out the door she yanked down on the tie and rolled her eyes, was there ever going to be a time when the world didn't make her pay for every small thing she did. Instead of heading straight back to the tower to prepare for her later patrol she wandered out to the grounds, they were the most peaceful of places and since everyone else was still inside, she was finding more and more time to get closer and closer to the lake. Of course she knew it wasn't exactly the safest place around but it sure did beat going to the tower and sleeping for three hour... right? Maybe not but who was she to turn around when half way there? The moment that she saw a long haired brunette sitting out close to the lake she thought about that awful Black girl, she had just the same look about her-- wait. What was she doing, the girl was fisting her hair and shoving it back into a ponytail with her head tilted slightly to the side Lily could make out the impression of one of her closest friends. Oh sweet Ripley. Well maybe not always sweet but such a courageous girl, she always was one to speak her mind and that was exciting.

Lily hadn't really been concentrated on the tears coming from the brunettes eyes as she grew closer. Something was different about her today and Lily wasn't exactly sure what it was. Was Ripley-- no. Ripley was wearing makeup, yes it was light but it was well applied, better then Lily ever did hers that was for sure. The she started noticed the puffy brown orbs that held such thick tears. Dropping her books down Lily quickly sat down and got as close as possible. It was a girl thing, a comfort thing. Taking off the robe that suffocated her in Lily laid it down on the grass beside them. "Ripley, what happened?" It was a rare occurrence to see her crying that was for sure. In fact it took her back a bit, what exactly could make such a willful girl cry? Lily could barely think about her detention when it came to someone she cared about so upset, it was something selfless inside of her that always went to anyones rescue, it never mattered to her who they were, if they needed help she was there to try.

One day she was sure that would get her into trouble.

[Ripley Todd]

"Ripley, what happened?"

At the sound of Lily’s voice Ripley hurriedly used the heels of her palms roughly on her cheeks to rid the evil tears. Sniffling she put on a falsely bright smile, though her nose would’ve put Rudolph to same, and her eyes looked like she’d been smoking something. “Just some allergies.” She lied. “Hey Lil, how’s it going? Anything interesting happen today?” She was lying out her ass, she was a girl it was time she learned she wasn’t in front of the guys, and it was her and her best friend. “Why can’t he see?” She asked Lily quietly, more tears fell down her cheeks in uneven lines. “I’m just invisible to him. Am I not good enough? Am I not pretty enough?” She looked at Lily her full bottom lip trembling with the held back tears. “He sees right through me.”

Ripley covered her face with her hands, resting her elbows on her knees. “God I am acting like such a chick!” True. Usually Ripley resorted to punching things, here she was crying over Remus Lupin. “Punch me.” She lifted her head and stared at Lily through the blinding tears. “Please just fuckin’ punch me, good one right in the jaw, if you don’t I’m gonna pick a fight with that jackass Lestrange.” She let out a shuddering breath and sniffled loudly. “This fuckin’ sucks. Maybe I should kill him. Ya know,” She took a breath preparing to go on, and then shook her head. “Screw it, I don’t care. I don’t love him, it’s nothing like that, just a school girl crush.” Yeah, right, a crush that’s gone on for five years. Her conscious wasn’t helping any that was for sure.

Anger was going to replace sadness at some point, it would just hit and that’d be the end of the tears, but for now she wanted to cry. “Ya know, Lil, every night I use to wish upon one of those first star things, that maybe someone could fix what that jackass did,” That jackass would’ve been her third year boyfriend, that completely ripped her heart to shreds by cheating on her with a Slytherin. “And I thought Remus was it, he’s a great friend, don’t get me wrong, but,” A tear slid down slowly and dropped onto Ripley’s bare knee. “I feel things when I’m with him; I want to be hugged by him as more then a friend, a cuddle even. And I’m just a hopeless romantic who’s going down the wrong fuckin’ path ‘cause let’s face it, Ripley Todd ain’t made for love. She’s made for being something that can be tossed around like a baby’s rattle.” Bitterness seeped to her voice. “And I’m just fuckin’ self-pitying myself because of it.”

She dug her fingers into her hair holding her head down, as if her stomach hurt. “I don’t like this feeling, Lily.” She turned her head, resting it on her right forearm, with her hands still in her hair. “It makes me weak; I am not supposed to be weak. I’m a hockey player, I’m a Gryffindor and I’m crying like a little Hufflepuff wimp! What the fuck is wrong with me? And don’t even say ‘you’re in love’ ‘cause I will go for a very long walk off a short pier.” She loved Lil to death for sitting down with her, Ripley wasn’t the easiest person to comfort she knew that.